Go Ask Alice

I feel like that book, I think the title is 'Go Ask Alice' or something like that. One of the only books that have ever caught my attention long enough for me to finish it. I am not a reader, but anything related to drugs always interests me. I find it so fascinating how }ensnaring{ drugs can become, and how a person's entire life and personality can shift. So that's why I love that book. But I feel like her because it is essentially a diary and she has so many ups and downs and that's just life. Life is full of ups and downs and changes and stagnation's. So interesting; so different. I was reading back to some of my older blogs as I like to do from time to time, and the one year anniversary of my blog was Oct. 14th. If you go back to that blog, my life was so similar and so different back then. The 7 friends who I once considered my 'best friends' are barely a glimmer on my acquaintance radar, with the exception of my main man, my current roommate. He and I probably had more in common then we ever knew. This situation is a blessing that we are now stuck together, because I think we're good for each other. But lets remember, those who I considered my best friends a year ago, are now people who I rarely bother to wave to on the street. I can only hope that doesn't happen to my current roommate and I.

}I would be much closer to alone at that point.{

Don't really have to worry about that now. Reading about my life in the past is a good exercise I feel like. I enjoy it. I can see how things are so similar, my worries and fears are so similar and it feels sooo long ago. In reality, it's been barely a year. I can actually remember that night when I first wrote my blog.

I have been thinking a lot about the future. What am I going to do? More College? That almost seems like the easiest thing to do. It also seems like the most awesome, I feel that grad school would be great because I could focus more on my main interests, and discover what I want to do. But it will probably be only more scary to enter the real world, for failure would be still ever imminent. I never used to worry so much about failing in my future. Its one thing I have been consistently confident about, I do believe in my ability to succeed at what I do, but what will I do is the question? If I have no direction, failure won't be far from view.

I'm going to try to get myself to bed now. I'll catch up with you tomorrow.