Another one of those days I guess. Can't really get enough of them. I'm trying to type and listen to music at the same time and its not working to well lol. So, I woke up as usual, ate way to much for breakfast, had a bad first half of my work out and a good last half. Went to the library, pretty good library time. I got to thinking about a lot of stuff at the library. Really brought back some old memories of mine, with some strong feelings, really weird. I was thinking about this girl that I was in love with, and I can't tell anymore if I am, but it doesn't matter cause thats not going anywhere anytime. But what matters is how I felt at the peak of my feelings, so much confusion, it was so crazy and they just come rushing back very suddenly and then also very dull, like I know intense the feelings were at the time so I feel it but its just an image of feelings. But, its just crazy thinking of that again, I barely talk to that girl anymore, it really sucks. It sucks how every things changed. The only stable good thing in my life is my work relationships, and my sister. I love the people I work with and I love my sister. Shes always there for me, I had to go spend time with her tonight. My roommates have really just completely lost themselves I feel like. I mean maybe its me but how can I tell? They want to move, they want me to move with them, but I don't want to. I have friends in this house, we would be ditching 4 of our friends, just to move two blocks away, and for what? I personally have nothing to gain by moving, moving is only going to have me lose my dignity as far as I can tell. Ditching friends of mine, fuck that. They say, "its too dirty here," "we'll get more girls if were in a frat." Wow, the two lamest things I think I maybe have ever heard. Maybe I'm just not up on that whole deal. Maybe smoking weed and being in a frat are two really cool things to do. I would join a frat, but to get away from idiots like my friends, not to get girls. Maybe I would get more girls, but thats really a plus. I can get girls now. God damn.
I really am so glad to have my sister. It's the best thing for me right now to have her, family is really great in the end. I don't care if im not so close with my other relatives, my immediate family is really great. Im so glad to have them. I can talk to my mom and my sisters when I need. Its nice. My older sister is smart, and she can give good advice if she is feeling level headed. Who knows when shes level headed though haha. She's pretty sick right now, still there for me though, and I am there if she needs me. Its good. And her roommate is real great too. I hope that my sister doesn't go to grad school in California, I sometimes think I want her to go there so that I can visit her, but fuck that also, I can go there myself, she doesn't need to live there. Her and I will always be best friends.
Life is really such a weird thing for me. I never know really whats going to happen next, very unpredictable life. Last year I would have predicted this year to be better then last, and last year was great. Too bad. This is like a 80% worse year then last year. I have my guitar, I was really inspired to play today, I played so well. I love days like that. Its like I am a god on guitar on days like today, I feel like no one can do better then me on guitar. I think I should be famous or something haha, Its so great. I also think about how one of my roommates who's being a dick can't touch me on guitar, he thinks he can, but he ain't got it. Sorry bro.
I'm glad that I'm talking to this girl right now. She's not the best girl in the world, but shes smart, cute, and interesting. Enough for me to allot some of my time to her. Life is a little easier with someone to hook up with from time to time, it can also be more complicated. I'm bad at deciding when its right to take it to the next level. Whatever, I don't really care, I think its next level time though. I like the next level, its a bit more fun.
I love blogs because on a day like today, I can really just get my thoughts out. Oh life. I have probably said that like 30 times throughout my blogs. Interest in this blog has diminished, I'm going to go to bed. Later blog.
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