A weekend to make me think

I decided that I would try and exercise tonight.

I want to think of events that have shaped my life, shaped who I am today, now. And why?

I may just review some moments I remember of my childhood. Why am I who I am.

I was on metafilter reading a blog about life changing experiences and the events that shaped peoples lives actually made me almost shed a tear. And I dont tear very often. It was intense. Its intense hearing the little things, or sometimes big things that change how people are. And who they are now. Years and years later.

Well. Here goes.

Experience 1 : When I was younger I was disciplined seriously for being out of line slightly. Once, my sister and I brought a lighter to school. We were caught, and sentenced to a 2 month intense lockdown in the house, grounding. My dad also beat us when we were little, and for me, that definitely taught me what would be appropriate and what would not be. I really believe that, I work hard today because I felt what being out of line could be.

Experience 2 : I learned at an early age that my parents were real people. The realization struck, quick, and hard, mostlikely around the time of their divorce. I think divorce may be hard on children because it makes them see their parents for who they are before they can handle it. For me, I could handle it, and I knew it was for the best. But I was still worried, and confused. My parents were never the same to me after that. Now I'm almost 21, and both of my parents are complete people. I can see every flaw and every grace for what they are, and I can see them for who they are. I know that I will not be better parents then they were. None of us are perfect.

Experience 3 : My friend had told me at age 7 that he was going to do heroine when he was old because it was only as bad as smoking a pack of cigaretts per day. I couldnt comprehend his logic. I couldnt understand that thought process, and it hit me that I dont relate to the way most people think. Thats when I realized I was different, not only on the outside, but on the inside.

Experience 4 : I'll finish this up tomorrow.